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Religious giftsThese two days all the time the humor is not quite good, because high school classmate got together to meet,basically be. Saw the high school classmate that did not see 13 years, sufferred some of stimulation. Also have feeling the “ that at everybody summary comes out works well, not as good as what marry! ”
Everybody also saw, I am to belong to that “ to work badly of course, marry bad ” , otherwise how the meeting is depressed!
Say myself first, live in the capital, of the Chinese Academy of Sciences reading a doctor, every month 1800 yuan, be about to graduate next year, also mean, I want unemployment. 1800 yuan also do not earn even this. This must make me depressed, do you say?
Husband every month 5000 yuan, double firewood of the end of the year. Plus illicit working a dot, can have 100 thousand one year. In Beijing this chooses fund namely low income.
Daughter 5 years old, go up nursery school! Have a house of 110, still do not have a car, deposit 50 thousand, as fast for person of 40 years old, be very depressed! Ah!
Of course, the cause that causes depression of the economy in the home is in I, above all, 1998—2001 year in earn money below not much circumstance, go to school for the little brother, for the repay a debt in the home! Face such embarrassed, the proper pride that rural child is worth to praise namely self-abased sense is stronger and stronger, be afraid of be looked down on. Be determined then, look for a setting, economy, ability, comparative with oneself, that has common language more. Ah! Then I abandoned the native of a lot of Beijing, chose my present husband, one comes from the child of Shandong country, honest and kind-hearted, responsible feeling, the man of sensible content with one's lot.
　　 If if I am again new,I am wanting to choose all the time, can I still choose him? The answer is such:
If, I meet without this classmate, I can choose him. If have this party, I will be hesitant.
Should leave in everybody when, a sister that has a meal together in those days asks me: “ how do you feel to pass now? ”
I say: “ tells the truth with you, before seeing you, I feel I am very happy! After seeing you, I feel oneself besides lack cash, everything is very good! She tells ” me: “ is meddlesome cannot your person is occupied. ” perhaps she is right.
Say this sister besides, one reads the person of the the Three Kingdoms as a child, a have an outstanding eloquence, can use literary quotation jest your person, the person of good looks of a part, one knows the person that does well to be inferior to be being married well as a child, the daughter of an officer! (do not look down upon an officer really, no matter business of intelligence quotient affection Oh) I am strange, ate a meal 3 years together with her, I did not learn these! You say not depressed ability is strange!
The word that uses herself says, had talked about 3 boy friends, the first is him love, oneself love the 2nd, the 3rd is he is married, she was married a native that she is in a city, she says not to want to assume too much life pressure! Her old the pubic has 4 flatlet, can saying simply was to angle tortoise husband.
How the wedding that listens to her to describing her is luxurious extravagant, charge has touched us to struggle half a lifetime, this differentia is apart from real deep feeling making a person. Contrast oneself rely on oneself to go all out in work even, have mug-up ash really meaning is cold.
　 　 Expert viewpoint
This society is actual really, undeniable what some people go is shortcut, some people need double hardship. These are objective existence, our both neither can be extreme also cannot deny. But in the final analysis, the accomplishment that those who decide the quality that a life retains still is one individual oneself, ability, character, if say a body home and staircase of extraction assimilate to, so the high ability put forward with also wanted this individual to have certain comes, oneself is too incompetent, too do not agree aspirant, so consider congenital advantage again favourable, also can obtain external a ring of light only, have nothing to do the essence of the life.
Marry well, how to just consider be married good? This has among them we how the problem of look upon marriage, having what kind of expectation value to marriage. If, we regard marriage as a turning point that changes life destiny, invest the word of sexual choice as a kind, so our certainly will should ignore or omit flank of the another in marriage: The feeling of emotive deepness and ego, because ideal after all thing is too little, we can be collected only the most important go accepting or reject. Such marriage probably dazzling, but may not is warm.
Not be to say to angle tortoise husband is met certainly marital misfortune good fortune, so think to have a place rather too twist acerbity. But the discretion of the marital quality of a person, of love satisfactory, also not be to pass the discretion of bridal ostentation and extravagance and position to be able to make judgement absolutely. That need the test ability of years will prove quite henceforth, can touch so that live time tatty, have the moral quality of constant feeling and massiness only, any external a ring of light of no help.
Marriage has sex of deal with concrete matters relating to work, but if deal with concrete matters relating to work arrives pallet and coarse, material arrives to have monetary power only, then such marriage also is not the thing that can assume lifetime absolutely. Perhaps to Everyman, still love each other with the person with him similar position more reliable, can reduce a few needless troubles that cause because of positional great disparity so.
　　 Marriage can break an illusion, marriage can subdue our habit, marriage will be terminative we are in the perfect feeling in love, have noisy have be troubled by, grow has taste, explode like chopped green onion the sort of feeling in boiler just is real life.
But we are certain the meeting is disappointed. Some people are opposite so the disappointment with painful him complete to marriage discovery in the process that traditional acknowledge has overturning, especially perceptual, pure, woman.
Actually, all marriage are same, having cannot the vicissitudes of life that character says and cross, we are lying between enclosure, lying between 1000 hill 10 thousand water, go seeing the landscape of others, those who see is peripheral surface, immanent thing, you know impossibly forever. A lot of marriage look especially orderly happiness, investigate because everybody had not lived jointly between each other,its reason is, and two people get along truly, rely on gossip to cannot understand only.
Look very beautiful, but look namely just. Change really, regular also meeting has such and such problem, occasionally, everybody is to standing to talk not the envies others affliction that the waist is fond of and joy.
Marital more needs a few guileless, the thing of firm, always want to one falls to actual process from high in the clouds, long years, imagine a person very hard forever attention you, for company you, hour and your soul is companion, this is a kind of excessive is begged. If marriage simplifies finally, can not dress namely have a meal do housework to sleep the job, domestic home is about the same, when you the heart is full of halcyon satisfactory when, ability is capable to enjoy marriage to bring your real joy.
Marriage also is not to must bind move and the life like the baby that join system, marriage also is not a stirred long song. Everything expands finally, what have decision effect actually is yourself. You are smiling to face the life, not too much and piteous, the life also can smile to you.
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